Christopher Grame

losing has always been a big part of my life and I don't know why. I always feel this great blow to my pride/self esteem when I lose. don't get me wrong I don't do it on purpose. If you were to bang your toe into the wall would you not get mad, angry or upset? of course you would it's just an instinct. well that's exactly what happens the moment I lose. I noticed that a few of my friends have that same exact problem as well and it pisses me off when they act that way so I can just imagine what it is like seeing me get pissed about losing. lmao you wouldn't believe some of the shit one of my friends says to me when he dies in halo 2. he goes "dude you didn't kill the guy fast enough!" ummm yeah, you died because I WASN'T PROTECTING YOU! lmao. oh boy I mean being a sore loser is one thing but blaiming me for not killing a guy fast enough that I didn't even know was after you? psh oh well I've done things like that before as well so I can't completely hate but at the same time it really gets me going. so what is there to do? I can't be like this forever because I'll only end up in a back alley brawl over a game of cards or something, haha. I looked up some tips to accept losing a little bit more gracefully and here are some of them.

Here are 7 tips to help you succeed.

1. Confront your behavior.
   Kids aren't born poor losers, so ask yourself where is your kid learning this behavior? Are you modeling good sportsmanship? Do you make excuses for your own difficulties? Blame your boss when something goes wrong? Yell at the coach? Criticize your kid's teachers in front of them? Your kid is watching. What can you do to be better example of good sportsmanship for your kid?
   
   
2. Call "foul" on your kid on the first hint of losing attitude.
   Each and every time your kid shows that bad attitude (he makes an excuse, blames others, can't accept criticism, boos, criticizes the teacher, coach, sibling), call him on it. Let him know plain and simple that kind of attitude isn't going to be tolerated any more. If he exhibits a losing attitude with others, take him aside and tell him what you noticed: "I heard you criticizing the teacher for your mistake," "You were fighting with the coach." or "You blamed all your teammates."
   
   
3. "Red card" any uncivil, aggressive behavior.
   Spell out your expectations: if your kid displays bad sportsmanlike behavior again, he will leave the game (play group, scout meeting, or whatever) on the spot or apologize. Your child has to recognize that he must be considerate of other people's feelings, and if he is not, he just simply may not participate. And if your child does display any aggressive, insulting, or rude behavior that goes over your line-such as booing, hitting, or cheating -- remove him from the activity.
   
   
4. Emphasize good sportsmanship.
   Some families have a personal motto that represents good sportsmanship: "It doesn't matter if you win or lose, it's how you play the game." "If you can't play nicely, you don't play," "Winning isn't everything." You might choose your family's favorite, hang up a few posters on the fridge, and repeat it again and again until kids can recite it without reminders.
   
   
5. Find teachable moments to show the right way to handle defeat.
   Kids need to learn that everyone suffers defeat, but there is a right (and wrong) way to handle setbacks. And the best lessons are those teachable moments. Use them: While watching the Olympics, a quiz or even a reality TV show, say, "There's only going to be one winner. Let's watch to see what the losers do. See-they're shaking hands with their opponents." Or "That was a tough competition. Did you notice how some of the kids acted who lost? They were complaining the event wasn't fair. They sure didn't act like good sports."
   
   
6. Teach your child to encourage her teammates.
   Good sports and good losers support and encourage each other. One way to help your kid be more encouraging is to teach the "two praise rule." It's simple: you must praise your peers at least twice before the event ends. Help your kid think of a few encouraging comments-for example, "Great job!", "Super answer!" "Amazing play!" Then suggest he practice the rule at any group activity.
   
   
7. Teach how to lose gracefully
   Not everyone can win; so we need to teach our kids how to accept victory as well as defeat--and do so gracefully. If we don't, our kids won't know how to handle their loss and because they lack that skill, they often look like poor losers. Here are a few ways to help fail with poise.
   
   
   • Help your child learn a statement to say to herself to bounce back from defeat: "Nobody's perfect." "I can turn this around." "I can handle this." Then help your kid practice saying the statement out loud again and again until she can remember to use it on her own.
     
     
   • Show how you cope with defeat, so your kid can model your example. Here's the formula: "My mistake was." "I learn..from my mistake." Example: "I had to redo a whole report today because I forgot to save the document on my hard drive. Next time, I'll save as I go along."
     
     
   • Create a phrase together your child can say when he suffers defeat so she sounds like a graceful loser-for example: "Good race!" "That was close." "Let's try again tomorrow." "Wow, I'm impressed." Help him practice it at home so he can confidently say it to peers.
     
     
   • Dust off the checker boards or Candyland games and hold Family Game Nights. It's a great way to help kids learn the rules of good sportsmanship. So model them as you play together: stick to the rules, no excuses or criticizing, play to the end, congratulate the winner. And deliberately allow yourself to lose sometimes so you can show how to lose gracefully.

Tuning up good sportsmanship is about how to help our kids play the game called life -- and how to play it well. We must replace a poor losing attitude with those glorious old homespun values of fairness and forgiveness. So roll up your sleeves, and let the attitude makeover begin.

well it sounds pretty good. I like the whole, giving other players compliments when they make a nice shot or something because I have never done that in the past. I usually just say CHEATER! or something. yeah I know I really have to get crack'n.

on to my weight loss. I weighed myself today and was 193.5! damn man I was 205 last month. this eating 5-6 times a day is so great I think that I will just eat like this for the rest of my life. the only problem is that this is working out a little tooo good for me if you know what I mean. every time something good happens to me something bad will happen at the same time so I need to watch out.

also I was playing lockdown a little bit more today and realised that it wasn't so bad. the thing is that the game is so much more realistic then the last. also you get a heartbeat sensor function like in the previous RS games for the computer. it's fun because you can use your HBS to see through the WOODEN doors and shoot people through them, haha. you can't shoot people through metal doors but you can see people through walls, desks ect.

anyways I'm going to try and get xbox live set up tonight so that I have something to do all week besides waste my time on this stupid freakin computer. oh and btw Counter Strike works on Joannas computer! It's a tad choppy. I mean like 1/2 a second but still I did not expect it to even come close to working. So from now on when I go to Joannas house I will have a bunch of stuff todo.